Thursday, August 03, 2006

The Rabbit - Woman's Best Friend?

I consider myself to be a pretty open minded and experimental person. Which makes it all the stranger that I went most of my life without owning a vibrator. I have certainly been adventurous and creative in my pursuit of pleasure, but feared that my compulsive personality would make me grow a little to attached to a battery-operated companion.

Then I decided to shake off my hesitation and see what all the fuss is about. Earlier this week, I got a Rabbit in the mail. It has gotten so much good buzz over the years (pardon the pun--or don't, but there are going to be plenty of them in this post so get comfortable), so I figured that would be a good one to start with.

Once I knew it was en route, I got excited (no, not that kind of excited... though the heat and all the working out I've been doing lately has certainly bolstered my libido). Would it be the most mind-blowing orgasm ever? Would I get so addicted that BF David would have to woo me back to the real thing? And what about the experience itself? Should I take myself out to a nice dinner, light some candles and play sexy music, tell myself how beautiful I look... or should I just watch some porn (I'll let you decide which seduction technique I opted for).

A few days later, I got my box of treats in the mail. Hooray! I couldn't wait to go home and give that Rabbit a whirl. BF David is in rehearsals for a play he's in this fall, so his schedule is a bit hectic during the week. And you know what they say, when the cat's away, the mice will play with their new sex toys. Or something like that. Except that I had to spend a few hours with my parents after work, which was nice, but I this vibrator was burning a hole in my totebag. I waited all these years to try one out, so every moment leading up to it felt ages away.

Finally, back at my apartment, I tore into the box and pulled out my new pretty pink friend. It was a bit smaller than I expected, which was fine-- in fact great, because it was a good size for a beginner and the thing was already not measuring up to my boyfriend, which meant there was no way I could get overly attached to it. For some reason, I got it into my head that the vibrator would run on AA batteries, which was awesome because I have rechargable ones. Of course, I didn't actually check until I received the package and noticed it took C batteries. Damn!

I rushed around the corner to the nearest bodega and asked for two packs of C's.

The shopkeeper turned around at a glacial pace and pointed up. "D's?" he asked.

Grr! Didn't he realize the urgency of the situation?

"C's," I reiterated, trying to keep my facial expression more I-really-need-these-for-a-flashlight than I-need-these-for-my-brand-spanking-new-orgasm-inducer.

I paid for my batteries, smiling at the Energizer bunny on the packaging. We'll see if they kept going and going.

"Did you hear there might be a blackout tomorrow?"

Yeah, well, if there was a blackout, I'd still be able to come in the dark.

Back at the lab, I got everything ready and familiarized myself with the switches. There was one for the whirling pearls at the base and there was another for the bunny-shaped clit-stimulator. I promised myself I wouldn't go too high on either setting, because I heard about how using a vibrator too much can desensitize a woman. A cautious plan and one that went right out the window when I was in the thick of it. Within a few minutes of the initial buzzing, I was satiated. Though a little later I tested it out again, just to, you know, make sure it worked properly and everything (it does).

Impressions? I had nothing to worry about. The real thing is always going to be better, not only because there's a person attached to it, but because the sensation of genuine, warm skin can not be replicated. I mean, I've got to have kissing in the mix. Also, while the vibrator buzzes at astounding speeds and is almost guaranteed to get you off, there's something about the experience that feels synthetic and mechanical (gee, I wonder why). At the same time, whether in a relationship or not, the real thing isn't always available, and even if it is, this toy is a great supplement. Plus, you can roll over and fall right asleep afterwards without hurting its feelings.

14 comments:

coasta said...

hilarious. again, I've got nothing to offer on this one.

I've never been able to bring myself to by one of those portable pussies (had to go with the alliterative term on that one).

actually, I've never really WANTED to by one of those things. For a guy, the real thing is WAY better.

There are some dudes that spend 5-6,000 dollars on life like manequins who's skin, hair, feel and movement mimicks a real woman.

if it came to that point for me, i'd blow my money on a hooker.

pookalu said...

three things:

-of course nothing is better than the real thing! even if they perfected virtual sex.

-coasta - there's this thing for men called the fleshlight. look it up. pretty funny.

-dolly - some women wax poetic about the rabbit. seriously. for the number of times that i've heard great things about this as the supplement for the real thing...everyone should try it. so i'm glad that you gave it the thumbs/ears up!

Dolly said...

Coasta,
I think it's a shame that there seems to be such a stigma against sex toys for men. It's perfectly acceptable for a woman to own a vibrator but if a guy gets something comparable he's supposed to be deeply embarrassed by it. And there's no need to be! Both men and women should have their outlet when they don't have a partner they can play with.

Pookalu,
Yes, I have been hearing Rabbit raving for ages now, which is why I wanted that to be the first vibrator I tried out. There's really no need to make it cute by putting rabbit ears on the thing, though. Then again, it is made in Japan...

Stephan said...

I don't understand why a lot of men, and even some women are threatened by sex toys. Hey, I am a guy, and I find sex toys fun! Not to use on me, but on a gf, it can be a lot of fun and arousing... I think it is just an enhancement to real sex... Can't replace, unless the real sex is ... REAL bad... ;-)

coasta said...

pookalu,

ha ha. those are great. my personal 'fav' is the Ice Butt 3000 Fleshlight.

http://www.fleshlight.com.au/cgi-bin/ccp51/cp-app.cgi?usr=51J6888969&rnd=5174522&rrc=N&affl=&cip=&act=&aff=&pg=prod&ref=CLB&cat=butt&catstr=HOME:butt



(ok, so I got carried away and added the '3000' bit. i thought it was funny.)

freefade3876 said...

sick fu*ks
;o)

clarissa said...

synthetic is the best way to phrase it. it's actually really funny because last week i was telling fiance-boy the same thing about my vibrator and i said it felt synthetic.

a couple of years ago, i got one of the rabbits (although i think my cute vibrator totem animal is a beaver) where the beads are on rotating tracks so that they can't be moved around so much - i had been talking to some vibrator aficionado and they were telling me a universal complaint about the pearls on some of the rabbit models is that when you get aroused and tense up that the beads can get pushed out of the way and sort of rendered useless - though i have no idea if that is a valid complaint or not.

and the thing is incredible in terms of literally going from zero to orgasm in about 30 seconds, but it's almost too much for me...i think aside from wanting the warmth and emotional aspect of sex or fooling around (even if the only emotion is lust) i just like more of a build up...i think for me because it's over so fast it isn't as enjoyable.

i've rarely had a hard time having orgasms (unless overindulgence of substances has been involved) but this just makes it too easy and some doesn't feel worth it.

Dolly said...

Stephan,
Who's to say you wouldn't enjoy sex toys used on you, too? You never know until you try...

Clarissa,
I could see why some women would have issues with the beads. Sometimes, at certain speeds, they could be a little too harsh during heightened sensitivity. And yes, it does seem a bit too easy having an electronic device get you off so quickly. But sometimes it's more of a maintenance thing than a special moment, so I don't mind the convenience. Plus, I'm sure it'll be fun in the context of play with BF David, too, as a once in a while thing.

Anonymous said...

Where have you been Dolly- spending too much time with your rabbit?!?!

Betty on the Beach said...

"Yeah, well, if there was a blackout, I'd still be able to come in the dark."
Dolly! So funny!

Dolly said...

Anonymous,
Do you want quality or quantity? New post just went up... just for you.

Betty,
See, now I know the trick is to have enough batteries for the flashlight and vibrator.

pookalu said...

coasta -- OMG. that's disgustingly funny!

Anonymous said...

The part about your quest for batteries reminded me of the scene from "Do the Right Thing" where Radio Rahib is trying to buy batteries for his boombox from a Korean shopkeeper - "D Motherf--ker, D!". Lends a whole new perspective on that scene... :)

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