how r u? ur pics r such a turn on id love to pleasure u orally with nothing in return write back
Dear Guy Who Doesn't Like Commas--or Most Punctuation for that Matter,
Oral pleasure for nothing in return? From some faceless stranger on the internet? My goodness, that sure is a generous offer. It's like I won the cyber-lottery. And, If your friends page is any indication, I'm sure I'd be in quality company, with "ShAnNoN" and "Luscious Latina"... yet I'm going to have to give it a miss. You know what they say, there's no such thing as a free oral pleasuring.
I am Gxxxx, 31, male, NYC.
summer over winter
beach over pool
boxerbriefs or boxers or briefs....
Autumn over spring.
Pool over beach.
Not telling you the contents of my underwear drawer or... not telling you the contents of my underwear drawer.
Proper use of ellipses over...
hello baby i ll like 2 know u more pls tell me more abt u u can mail me email@example.com i weant 2 bee ur friend am from us my name is mxxxxx
I'm touched that you want to "bee" my friend, really I am. If you didn't obviously take your writing style from the Prince School of Naming Songs, maybe we would even have a chance. Alas, I would not die 4 u and many things do, in fact, compare 2 u. I hope that doesn't hurt your feelings. Maybe I'm just like my father, too bold. Maybe I'm just like my mother...
wow ma im checkin out pages and i had to stop on urs and let u know that i think ur gorgeous i really like wat i see ma so when ever u can make sure u stay in touch dont be a stranger ok cutie .... take care luv
Dear "99-year-old" from Kearny, NJ with the Scarface Wallpaper,
Wow. I'm checkin' out my MySpace messages and I had to stop on yours and let you know I think you have found new and astonishing ways to butcher the English language. And your photos! That one picture that zooms in on your bicep with the heading "U CaNt HaNdLe"...? I think that shows remarkable insight. It's true, I CaNt HaNdLe. I wOuLdNt EvEn TrY.
Are you a model. Wow your'e very adorable and you so look young and pretty . I can't believe a sexy thing like you would be on here .You shold be out there driving all the guys wild with your sexy smile and your beauty.Well I am Rxxxx and i live in Xxxxx Xxxxxx NY . I have a pic so if you to see you may want reply back and il send to you or my aol screen name is dxxxxx im me there and ill show u my pic or email me firstname.lastname@example.org and i will send to you . Maybe who knows you might like talkin to me and we can get to know more about each other until then sweetness a kiss on your cheeks and a red rose for you @~~<~<~ but not as red as your lipz
My name is not Bebe; are you sure you're not confusing me with Ms. Neuwurth?
Actually, I'm not a model, but gosh, how terribly flattering for you to confuse me with one! That must mean that you think I'm, like, really very adorable and young and pretty or something! You are such a charmer! And your blatant disregard for proper placement of the period is so sexy I can't stand it. You should be out there driving all the girls wild with your selective capitalization of the possessive "I". Maybe who knows you might like to learn to write a coherent sentence some day. It would be our secret. My "lipz" are sealed.
[ETA: None of the above responses were actually sent. Mocking the messages on my blog is one thing...]